I Give Up.

No, seriously. I give up.

God doesn't want me to have a drivers license. And I'm okay with that.

Really, really, I am.

Now, just to clarify, I do actually have a drivers license.  I obtained it October 22, 2007.  When I was 17 (I do everything a little slow.)

eric's reasons on why his license should be revoked:

1.  The first times that I manned the Land Cruiser alone, I backed it into a blue spruce.  It was on our lawn. It scraped the front fender and broke the bug deflector. 

2.  A few months later, on Thanksgiving, I backed the Land Cruiser into my fathers work truck.  The truck was fine, but the Land Cruisers door was not.  I'm thankful for being an awesome driver.

3.  A year and a half later, in February, actually having a license this time, I totaled one of my dads work trucks.  Coming home from work.  In the mall parking lot.  Hitting, not a car, but a 10,000 pound lamp post, with a friendly cement base.

4.  I go off to Hawaii.  Then, home for Christmas break, I blow a tire on the freeway in the Land Cruiser coming home from Salt Lake.  I don't know how to repair a flat.  Awesome.  I am wearing my locals.  Double awesome.

5.  Just days after the tire incident,  Two days before Christmas, driving in Provo, in the Land Cruiser, in a foot of snow, I slide into some poor man. Completely tore up the front passenger side of the LC (man that car has been through a lot, little guy, he's a trooper).  Merry freakin' Christmas.

6.  Well, I pay that deductible off (I tend to do that a lot), and then go back to Hawaii.  Weeks after my return, in a truck (different truck, new truck), I scrape the side with a pole as I come out of a bank stall.  I will never be a patron of Wells Fargo, thank you.

7.  To pay this off, I start a job(the job I currently have, almost a year later) and get this, as a driver.  Well, a month goes by, and a man runs a red light right in front of me, as I begin to go through the intersection. Awesome. But he didn't hit me.  The other guy that ran a red light in the same intersection just seconds after, in the opposite direction, does hit me. Awesome.  Dealing with insurance is terrific, I love being patronized for hours over the phone.  Thank you, weird guy from Colorado here on business, you are the best.

8.  Winter rolls in, but the snow plows do not.  There is seriously two feet of snow on Bangerter Highway (the busiest highway in Utah), packed and slick, with snow falling around, and I lose control and hit a reflective pole. Delightful.  But it was on company time, so no deductible for me!

9.  April 27, 2010, my last accident that will ever be witnessed by anyone or anything. Ever. Because my license will be cut up.  By me, because I didn't cause the accident.  Some trick named Taffara rammed the bumper of my delivery truck.  But I am sick of it.  I'm done.  Once I leave this job (in two weeks) I will be done. No more driving for Eric ever again.

Thank you.

Oh, did I tell you that I have been on driving probation for about 9 months? Yeah.  I love driving. Driving is my favorite.